Wednesday, October 3, 2007
Dear Neighbors,
Dear Next Door Neighbor(s) I never know who is living there each week,
You moved in about the same time I did, you seemed friendly. We keep to ourselves, you keep to yourself. I actually prefer it that way since we have very opposite lifestyles, yet I am friendly when I see you. Have I gone out of my way to talk to you? Probably not, I know that isn't very Christian of me. Here are my reasons for not taking the time:
1. You scare me, your temper is loud, mean and horrible. You scream at your "flavor of the month" in such a tone that FREAKS ME OUT! You think that no one can hear you, are you kidding me, our walls are attached! Our bedroom windows face each other! You even scared my big tall Italian friend Gustavo (now I didn't think that was possible)!
2. Your music is too loud...or is that music! That banging sound coming from your stereo is purely obnoxious, especially on Saturday morning which is the ONLY day of the week we can sleep past 5:20am!
3. You come home with 1 dog, great I am ok with that even though I am NOT A FAN of Weiner Dogs. Then you come home with another dog, the same breed. Now, it's not that I care about your dogs (I have one I want to get rid of myself), it's that you have taken on the same tone and sounds of the dogs from 10pm till my husband, some other neighbor has to ask you to SHUT UP KINDLY! Seriously do you believe that your dog noises aren't being heard by others, AGAIN TOUCHING WALLS!
4. You BROUGHT HOME 2 MORE DOGS...are you INSANE!?!? Now, you decide that while you are doing your Alteration THING at Nordstroms that the dogs can no longer be kept inside so you put them outside ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT! They bark non-stop, they bark to bark, not just at a passerby or something to bark at, they bark NON-STOP! Now, you were warned about this by the Association, did you make any changes NO! I HATE YOUR DOGS! Now FYI...again I am looking for a good home for my dog, can I place an ad for yours also? PLEASE!
5. You sound just like a dog, your voice doesn't even sound human! I dread the nights you get home after 11pm because you talk, act and sound like a dog! You play and run around with those dogs ALL night! I of all people understand not being able to sleep at night but I DON'T keep my family up and play with my dog all night! I really think you are WHACKED!
6. You bring in your flavor of the month and they leave their trash on top of my trash cans on trash day. Big deal, I know...but they shop at all the stores I am dying to shop at but can't afford! Seriously what can your male friends be shopping for at BEBE? I realize that this is my jealousy problem but I thought I would add it to my letter since I am SO flipping angry with you right now!
So, those are just a few things to chew on while I sit here on my day off contemplating my next move to get rid of your dogs and music. I am a nice lady and we are a nice family but you are making me think of things to do to you and your dogs that I shouldn't be thinking of! We are Christians and I want to be forgiven for my thoughts but seriously they consume me because of the barking going on in my head RIGHT THIS MINUTE!
So basically what I am trying to say is: SHUT UP!
Sincerely your neighbor,
ME
link | posted by Heather McTaggart at 9:20 AM
4 Comments:
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PETE Di LALLO had this to say:
The only solution....
POISON MEAT! thrown in small amounts over the fence daily until barking stops...
not too Christian-like but I'm Italian...- October 3, 2007 at 11:12 AM
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Heather McTaggart had this to say:
Thanks for the advice! We were going to try pepper spray last night but learned it doesn't affect them one bit! I am losing my mind over the dogs and the "guys" there! CRAZY!!!
- October 3, 2007 at 5:00 PM
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Julie Hibbard had this to say:
My dad is hilarious...
Don't you have an association? That's who to call first. Then the police if it's really a disturbance!
I am not a dog fan at all.
Make the call girl!
I love this blog tho!- October 3, 2007 at 6:18 PM
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Heather McTaggart had this to say:
They were warned by the association but that didn't affect them! He must have sown his ears shut when he was altering something! Last night was much better, now I am not saying I know who left the nasty letters on his door (I swear I DIDN'T) and I am not I do, but the dogs were better behaved!
- October 4, 2007 at 3:29 PM
